The last few weeks have been quiet. Big stretches of work have marked the last few months, and while I have projects to move on to (my horseshoe theory doc), I haven’t been able to conjure the motivation.
Instead, I have taken some needed rest. My batteries have taken longer to recharge than usual, likely partly because my recent work has been on a contentious issue (the plagiarism stuff Hbomberguy kicked up and the harassment campaign that ensued). I believe in my work, and I have gotten to a point where I understand I have no control over people in the outside world (and am grateful for the ability to be heard at all). People being angry at me because I dared question the object of their fandom just doesn’t bother me at this point in my life.
What took the most out of me was likely when what I repeatedly said could happen (that endlessly swarming this man could end badly) happened (to at least some extent). The truth is, even right now, we don’t know anything about what happened with James Somerton. He posted a suicide note, and we have heard nothing else from him. We got a few self-interested messages from Hbomb’s producer, as that camp has been looking for evidence to absolve itself.
Right now, indications are that he is likely still alive and potentially in the hospital. Hopefully, that is the case.
I was resting/watching YouTube videos, and this thumbnail came up. Immediately, I was reminded of someone very near to my heart (who resembles this man in precisely zero ways). That person says, “fo’ward.”
So, I watched the video.
As it turns out, when a word contains duplicate consonants, one is sometimes dropped for easier pronunciation. It is somewhat related to whether or not one’s accent is “rhotic,” but not entirely dependent on it. When non-rhotic Bernie Sanders says “fo’whid” he softens/drops both Rs, not just the first.
I find “fo’ward” very charming. It’s a quirk that isn’t “quirky,” for lack of a better way of saying it. I have never really encountered it, so it’s fairly unique in my experience. It’s likely just that it reminds me of someone I am fond of. I’ve discussed it with them and always just chalked it up as “a thing they do that I like.” When I saw this video, I wanted to tell them about it. I hope I remember the next time I see them because I think they’d find it interesting. Right up their alley.
“We’re a fo’ward-thinking family.”
This little trip down memory lane reminded me that, although it is perfectly fine that I am trying to recharge a bit, it’s important for me not to get stuck. I don’t live a life of narcissistic whimsy, nor do I want to. I live with purpose. While all may not appreciate it, that has never been my goal.
Further, it seems that more are coming to appreciate my perspective. I can be bombastic or curmudgeonly, but I am ultimately an empathetic person who seeks truth.
Time to get up and do the next thing. Fo’ward.